So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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