Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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