hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he tried to convert me to islam
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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