you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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