Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
