Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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