I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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