Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Randomize
