wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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