He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
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I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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