I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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