You work out of a Hotel?
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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