She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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