would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
