Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.