walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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