i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.