Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
