Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
