Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
