operation harelip BJ is a go
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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