I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
