This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
