Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
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