I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Randomize
