i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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