when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
