It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
