Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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