so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Randomize
