like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
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I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
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We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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