He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
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I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Boobs are out for the taking
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
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I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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