Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
