For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
