We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize