I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
People in love make me want to vomit
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
