I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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