You're so nebulous sometimes
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
