no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize