So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
