Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
