how hairy? two words: wookie tits
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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