Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
