Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
