Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
True strength comes from lack of pants
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
