I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
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Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
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I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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