so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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