she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize