As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
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