Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
