What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
